tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-899120267887242073.post5859749977241466938..comments2023-04-08T02:20:36.246-07:00Comments on Flash Jab Fiction: Flash Jab Challenge 10Jack Bateshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16055185636509700845noreply@blogger.comBlogger15125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-899120267887242073.post-28326971876795498222012-03-11T13:35:07.567-07:002012-03-11T13:35:07.567-07:00Great stuff, enjoyed those.
AJ, you do so much wi...Great stuff, enjoyed those.<br /><br />AJ, you do so much with so few words. Wonderful writing, as always.Authorhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14581854897484618741noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-899120267887242073.post-16870743887593424832012-03-11T00:58:59.444-08:002012-03-11T00:58:59.444-08:00Thanks Dave. We'll definitely have to get toge...Thanks Dave. We'll definitely have to get together with AJ for that pint, although I suspect a gallon may be a more accurate assessment.<br /><br />Kristin, Richard, Veronica, Chris and Absolutely Kate All I can say is - The kind words that you leave for me are what spurs me on as a writer. Knowing I have you guys reading, appraising and liking my work gives me the confidence to write my twisted little "dark, cold, light and funny" tales. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for your support. Without it I wouldn't dare show my work.Graham Smithhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15561493204302079903noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-899120267887242073.post-44523879158611839922012-03-10T14:04:48.780-08:002012-03-10T14:04:48.780-08:00Richard. Thanks for the props. Coming from you it ...Richard. Thanks for the props. Coming from you it makes me feel great.<br />Lady NOLA: Thanks for the kind words. Rampart and Toulouse is still frimly top five in my "must read" list.<br />Absolutely OKatie: Aw shucks, Pal. You're makin' me feel like diggin' my toe in the dirt and blushin'. Glad you got the entenrdes double or triple. Tanks.<br />Lady Veronica: Thank you. That gal was off the coast of Italy or Greece in my mind . . . but I'll settle for the deep blue Pacific also. :)<br />Hey, Chris. Thanks, man. You know how highly I count your opinion.AJ Hayeshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02765836513403665199noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-899120267887242073.post-28449785800151581682012-03-10T12:55:18.561-08:002012-03-10T12:55:18.561-08:00Two excellent and very different stories. Graham&#...Two excellent and very different stories. Graham's is funny and light and ridiculous. AJ brings us back to earth with a beautifully melancholy piece.Chris Rhatiganhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05769089157184374652noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-899120267887242073.post-57247548472043159882012-03-10T12:37:04.526-08:002012-03-10T12:37:04.526-08:00AJ - This left me a bit breathless! A poignant &#...AJ - This left me a bit breathless! A poignant 'stab-to-the-heart' love story with its subtle entendres layered in a few short sentences. <br /><br />Excellent wordsmithing!<br /><br />Which bit of coast did you say the girl with the high-turned breasts was at? <br /><br />;-)Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13430872985988041256noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-899120267887242073.post-25373966651890994262012-03-10T12:18:26.155-08:002012-03-10T12:18:26.155-08:00"Her eyes rolled back in perfect synchronisat..."Her eyes rolled back in perfect synchronisation with her buckling knees."<br /><br />Brilliant line that... gave me a wonderful mental image!<br /><br />Graham, this is cold and dark... and a bit of wicked humour. Taught that bitch well, you did... she'll not be shorting anyone's expenses again!<br /><br />The icing on this 'word cake'? Expensing out the murder... bloody brilliant!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13430872985988041256noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-899120267887242073.post-44373785648185722232012-03-10T12:00:26.029-08:002012-03-10T12:00:26.029-08:00Almost forgot:
'Rapture of the Deep' was ...<i>Almost forgot:<br /><br />'Rapture of the Deep' was the most touching double or triple entendree title. Way to go Clyde.</i>Kate Pilarcik ~ absolutelyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12430278736281847787noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-899120267887242073.post-44116009180527924202012-03-10T11:52:27.564-08:002012-03-10T11:52:27.564-08:00She held him close and breathed for him while he m...<i>She held him close and breathed for him while he made love to her.</i> <br /><br />Ahhhh, <i>felt</i> that one, dear Mr honing Hayes. The splendor of the eyes, the longing from the tub all splashed so well o'er my tender psyche. As the illustrious Sir Godwin illuminated ~ mastery of mood becomes you.<br /><br />~ ~ ~ <br /><br />And then there's the diabolical mind of our Mr Smith, emanating his tale out of - natch - a pub scene dare. What intricacies his evil plot gets sticky with. Remind me never to linger too close at a professional gathering. Nice play of 'balance and stability' against 'halving expenses'. Thy clever ever sneaks in.<br /><br /><i>~ Absolutely*Kate, lingering to admire Ms Abbot's wonder of a photo to wonder upon. Real sweet challenge Jack. Wish I woulda come ashore for this one</i>Kate Pilarcik ~ absolutelyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12430278736281847787noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-899120267887242073.post-47242761160487688602012-03-10T10:41:25.249-08:002012-03-10T10:41:25.249-08:00Graham, I love the idea of expensing a murder.
Bi...Graham, I love the idea of expensing a murder.<br /><br />Bittersweet and beautiful, AJ. It hit me straight in the heart.Kristin Fouquethttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12719699758368292149noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-899120267887242073.post-79750863834140635712012-03-10T09:48:03.204-08:002012-03-10T09:48:03.204-08:00AJ few writers can say so much with such economy. ...AJ few writers can say so much with such economy. You are able to evoke a world in a few lines, I loved this one.<br /><br />Graham,the precise physical nature of the language here is extremely strong. Great story.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-899120267887242073.post-490250545911587712012-03-10T09:36:16.484-08:002012-03-10T09:36:16.484-08:00Thanks Loretta. The siren call of the sea fascinat...Thanks Loretta. The siren call of the sea fascinates us all I think.<br />Graham, I'll make sure when David and I sit down to a pint someday you'll be at the same table and the bull will fly! :)<br />Thanks David. The short stuff is hard to keep right (as you know) I'm glad it worked out.AJ Hayeshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02765836513403665199noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-899120267887242073.post-80667018590684584552012-03-10T08:33:35.638-08:002012-03-10T08:33:35.638-08:00Graham - HA! Priceless indeed. Well done!
AJ - ...Graham - HA! Priceless indeed. Well done!<br /><br />AJ - A lot of story in very few words. Nice work, buddy!David Barberhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05006533626998905560noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-899120267887242073.post-90290481041788738622012-03-10T08:01:00.054-08:002012-03-10T08:01:00.054-08:00Thanks Loretta. It's an hour to share a stage ...Thanks Loretta. It's an hour to share a stage with master wordsmith AJ Hayes.<br /><br />AJ, I love where your imagination has taken you from the picture. Like Loretta says Kraken is a much underused term. Great story all round.Graham Smithhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15561493204302079903noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-899120267887242073.post-83736610491960644332012-03-10T07:07:50.168-08:002012-03-10T07:07:50.168-08:00Loved the use of the term, Kraken...I haven't ...Loved the use of the term, Kraken...I haven't seen that in a long time:) I enjoyed the visual of the mermaid breathing life into him...I have a piece out there under my pen name,L Reveaux, titled Siren's Call, which used the same technique. <br />I found the tub at the close of the story, quite intriguing:)<br /><br />LoLoretta Wheelerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07992133163167526850noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-899120267887242073.post-28036151242504547232012-03-10T07:02:28.411-08:002012-03-10T07:02:28.411-08:00Graham,
The story definitely clips you on the chin...Graham,<br />The story definitely clips you on the chin:) It's hard hitting, as I'm sure it's meant to be. Great use of description:)<br /><br />LoLoretta Wheelerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07992133163167526850noreply@blogger.com